I woke up thinking about you this morning and wondered how your heart feels.
The world we live in is beautiful in many ways and and it is filled with endless joys.
But it often doesn’t feel that way.
When you keep your heart closed for protection a sadness and loneliness sets in. Yet the flipping and flopping, back and forth, from opening and closing your heart becomes exhausting.
When your heart has only experienced and known pain in your life, then it can be hard to appreciate the beauty and the joys, and any real pleasures.
When this pain comes from the very people that you are told ‘should be safe’ (aka parents, family members, partners, close friends etc), it becomes hard to trust anyone and open up your heart.
How are you expected to trust anyone when you have been shown repeatedly that you cannot even trust those ‘close’ to you?
I often say, “Is it any wonder people are confused, when they have been so abused?”
So, after experiencing hurt, you naturally pull back and retreat from people for protection.
But this is where the challenge comes in.
You pull back for protection and close off your heart.
Yet, two of the most central aspects of life are connection and meaningful relationships.
So, what you do is necessary in the situation you are in — but it comes at a cost.
Often, when someone is protecting their heart, they may feel they are doing themselves a service but it is very possible that they are suffocating and harming themselves.
I recall a session many years ago with one of my coaches. I was asked to close my eyes, look inside and visualise what my heart looked like.
At this time I was at my sickest, physically and emotionally. In my mind’s eye I was shocked to see my heart was barely beating.